who is the real king?

Ok, I recently went through a torture called ‘Singh is Kinng’. though m a singh n Akhshay is not..but in those 3 long hours he was the real king and I along with some 300 poor souls(-25 real singhs) was treated like an utter fool. It was a film that took its viewers for granted(n whats wrong in tht I had already paid for the ticket), the director assumed absolute liberty in the name of cinema, Can you imagine that a person who could wreck havoc just to catch a hen in a punjab village can neatly manage an underworld empire in Australia, 4 people boarded the wrong international flights so that our Akki can have a nicely picturized song in Egypt as probably was suggested by cinematographer(hence the story mein twist). Add to it a hell lot of stupidity interspersed with songs, forced comedy, mamta (motherly love), national pride and the repeated ‘Singh is king’ nonsense… thats wat you go thru in those 3 hours.

I am not writing a review, thats really not the point. Whats the purpose of reviewing a movie hundreds of whose reviews r already out there on the internet.

I am writing it to point out to a new theory that popped out in my mind while I was going through that torture. This theory has made me an even bigger admirer of Akshay Kumar.

I’ll name my theory as “Theory of Stardom and Trashiness in Bolllywood”

‘SIK’ (wow how apt.. SI/C/K) was released and claimed the biggest opening of this year, there were houseful boards even after a week of its release and recently I read that the movie has already garnered more than 100Cr Rs worlwide..Given that the movie it self is quite pathetic, what all this tellls you is just one thing..that Akki has become the biggest star in bollywood.

Let me explain this with my new theory, fact is that in bollywood the biggest star is the one who can carry such absolutely ridiculous, senseless and entertainment less movies alone on his shoulders, get the returns from the box-office and force everyone to assume that the movie perhaps was actually quite good.

Sharukh did it with absolute trash like KANK and a mediocre movie like OSO and became the real darling of bollywood, this was after Akki had done somethin similiar with ‘Garam Masala’ and many other between the lines movies. But Akki has finally won the top slot with SIK, I believe that if he can sell SIK, he can sell any movie.

So it’s simple,
Star’s power = sigma(BO success*Trash quotient of the movie)

So if a ‘Chak de’ becomes a hit, SRK hardly adds to his star value as the movie was actually good and would have done well anyway(or the marginal utility was less). By the same logic Shiney Ahooja got nothing much out of his performance in Gangster(Huh..good movie thee yaar)

Now in my opinion the only way that someone can ever challenge Akki is to come up with an even more crappy movie(OMG thats a herculean task) and make it a hit or at least make an equally crappy movie(even thats not easy at all, going by the high/low standards set by SIK) and try to touch its BO results.

Both of these scenarios indicates that Akki is gonna remain the real King for quite some time, so just hope that after setting the new bar for ‘Star Power’ he will now try not to assert the same thing again and again and yeah, hail the new megastar!